S1 Episode 08: Return to Dating

*Bo is looking in the mirror while putting on a tie. Grandma walks up behind him. "what you getting all spiffy for?" Grandma asks. "If you must know mother, I am going on a date." Bo says. Grandma bursts out laughing. "I don't recall telling a joke." Bo says. "The joke is you going out on a date! You haven't dated in over 10 years!" Grandma says. "That isn't exactly true! There was a Queen, but I dated her very briefly." Bo says. "So when are we leaving?!" Grandma asks. "We?" Bo asks. "Yeah. Me, you, Yeller, when are we all going on the date?" Grandma asks. "You and Yeller are NOT accompanying me!" Bo says.

*At a restaurant, Bo, Grandma, and Yeller are all sitting at a table. "I hate this place, why didn't they put ketchup on the table? How am I supposed to steal the ketchup if its not on the table?! I bet this is one of those cheap dumps that gives it to you in a tiny cup." Grandma says. "Or they do it in order to protect it from thieves like you. Do you realize that when you steal ketchup, that means the restaurant has to by more, thus making them lose a lot of money?" Bo asks. "How is that my problem?!" Grandma asks. Bo sighs. "Its okay Grandma, I understand your point of view." Yeller says. "I know you do sweetheart, you were always smarter than your father." Grandma says. A woman walks over to the table. "Uh, is anyone at this table Bo Yeller?" She asks. "I am. I apologize for the table being so crowded, but my family INSISTED on being here." Bo says. "Don't lie son, you needed us here cause your too stupid to talk to woman on your own. He never had a girlfriend until he was 25 you know! That's cause all of his classmates in high school thought he was a nerd." Grandma says. "Mother!" Bo scolds. "Well that was a long time ago." The woman says. "You hear that son? She's calling you old!" Grandma says. "I doubt that's what she meant. So tell me, what is your name?" Bo asks. "Carol." Carol says. "What a generic name." Grandma says. "Mother!" Bo scolds again. "So tell me, what exactly are your intentions with my son?" Grandma asks. "What do you mean?" Carol asks. "How do we know your not secretly plotting to steal my family's vast fortune?" Grandma asks. "What fortune?" Yeller asks. "I don't care about money, I just care about finding a good guy." Carol says. Grandma leans over to Bo. "She's too perfect son, there has to be something wrong with her. I bet she's going to blow up the restaurant!" Grandma whispers. "You're being far too paranoid for my liking. Bo says. "Your being far too stupid for my liking!" Grandma says. "Am I going to get more than two lines in this episode?" Yeller asks. "Shut up!" Bo and Grandma yell at Yeller. "Um, can we order now?" Carol asks. "Who's paying for this meal?" Grandma asks. "Bo is." Carol says. "You're forcing my son to buy you dinner? BUY YOUR OWN DINNER YOU FREELOADING MOOCH!" Grandma yells. "Mother, calm down. I offered to buy the dinner." Bo says. "Or maybe she made you think you offered! But really, she manipulated you into offering!" Grandma says. "I would never!" Carol says. "Look lady, I don't know who you think you are, but we're not falling for this crap. My son might be an idiot, but my grandson and I are NOT!" Grandma yells. "That's right we're not! We know what you are up to! What is she up to Grandma?" Yeller asks. "She wants the family fortune." Grandma says. "We don't have a family fortune." Yeller says. "Yes we do." Grandma says. "I have no interest in your money! Actually, I'm all ready very rich!" Carol says. "How convenient." Grandma says. "So, Carol, what do you do for a living?" Bo asks. "I run my own company." Carol says. "Where's your office? In a dumpster? And where the heck is the ketchup?" Grandma asks. "That's it! I AM DONE!" Carol yells. "I told you she was crazy. Now she's yelling at us!" Grandma says. "You seem like a very nice guy Bo, but I can NOT deal with these people!" Carol says before storming off. "Was it something I said?" Grandma wonders. "Bo starts crying. "Well, on to the next date!" Grandma says.