S2 Episode 13: Nightmare on Yeller Street

*Yeller comes downstairs and yawns. "What's for breakfast?" Yeller asks. "Son, I'm afraid it is four in the afternoon. "Oh, I better turn in then." Yeller says. "NOT so fast! I have some wonderful news to share with you!" Bo says. "What is it?" Yeller asks. "Dun Dun has been paroled early, and she has been assigned to come live with us until her parole is over!" Bo says. "Well how long will that be?!" Yeller asks. "Five years." Bo responds. "Five years? FIVE YEARS?! WE HAVE TO LIVE WITH THAT NO GOOD, BRAINLESS, THIEVING LOSER FOR FIVE YEARS?! I'D RATHER GET MOWED DOWN BY A STEAM ROLLER AND THEN BACKED OVER BY IT THEN HAVE TO LIVE WITH THAT UGLY BEAST!" Yeller yells. Yeller turns around and sees Dun Dun. "Why hello Dun Dun!" Yeller says. "Dun Dun no like this no more then you do, ugly bald man, but she must listen to bad police men." Dun Dun says. "Oh, she also isn't allowed to exit the grounds of the home for the next five years as well." Bo says. "Are you freaking kidding me?!" Yeller angrily asks. "Oh don't worry son, I'm sure it wont be that bad!" Bo says. "Why would you say that? You hate Dun Dun! I don't even understand why you would allow this!" Yeller says. "Me and your morally questioned friend have come to an understanding." Bo says. "You Daddy and Dun Dun in love and we getting married." Dun Dun says. "WHAT?!?!?!?!?!?" Yeller angrily asks. "My love, I wanted to be the one to tell her." Bo says. "What is this world coming too? What's next?!" Yeller angrily asks. Cop comes in. "I haven't done anything today, so get lost." Yeller says. "I'm not here to arrest you, I'm here cause I'm moving in. You see, your old man and Dun Dun wanted to adopt a child, and somehow, I was put up for adoption. I'm not even a child!" Cop yells. "Shut up, little boy, Mommy and Daddy didn't give you permission to talk." Dun Dun says. "Does nobody see anything wrong with this picture?" Yeller asks. "Not at all, I am quite happy with the family I have made for myself." Bo says. "Dad, I am going to try and ask this in the nicest way possible. HAVE YOU COMPLETELY LOST YOUR MIND?!" Yeller angrily asks. "No, no, son, I have not. In fact, I feel that marrying this woman and adopting my wonderful child have been the two best decisions I have ever made." Bo says. "Thank you honey, Dun Dun love you too." Dun Dun says. Bo, Dun Dun, and Cop share a group hug as Yeller looks on in shock. "Okay, I need to get out of here before I throw up." Yeller says before running out. "Was it something Dun Dun saw?" Dun Dun asks. "Its said, darling. Something you said." Bo says. "Don't correct Dun Dun's gram crackers!" Dun Dun yells. "Grammar, dear." Bo says. "Leave Dun Dun alone!" Dun Dun yells before running into the closet. Bo tries to open the door, but its locked. "Oh come now baby, don't do this!" Bo says.

*Yeller is sitting on a plane. A big fat lady sits next to him, so big that Yeller is cramped into the wall. "So, you going to Hawaii too?" The lady asks. "No, I'm just on the plane to go to Hawaii and then I'm gonna stay on when we land so I can fly back. Of course I'm going to Hawaii!" Yeller says. "Well, you don't need to be so rude!" The lady says. Yeller ignores her and looks out the window. "You know, I brought my kids with me on this here flight." The lady says. "Great, where are they? Hijacking the plane?" Yeller asks. "No, don't be silly, I'm a good ma, I look after my kids." The lady says. "Then where are they?" Yeller asks. "KIIIIIIIIIIIDS!!!" The lady yells. Two little boys come up the seat. "Yes mama?" One of the boys asks. "You were behaving yourself, right?" The lady asks. "Yes mama, we were REAL good." The other boy says. One of the flight attendants comes in and walks over to another. "I just found Sheryl tied up in the bathroom. Apparently, two little boys robbed her of all the peanuts we have on this flight." The attendant says. "Should we investigate?" The other attendant asks. "That witch stole my promotion, I didn't even untie her. Does that answer your question?" The flight attendant asks. "Hey, you mind watching my boys while I go to the bathroom?" The lady asks. "Would it matter if I said no?" Yeller asks. "What's that? You'll do it?" The lady asks. "No, that's actually not what I said." Yeller says. "Great! I'll be back in a jiff." The lady says before getting up and walking away. The little boys are both looking up at Yeller. "Wanna play?" The boys both ask. Yeller lets out a big sigh.

*"Enough is enough dear, please come out of the closet so that we may discuss this at length." Bo says. "NO! Dun Dun sick of no one appreciating her intelligence!" Dun Dun yells. "What intelligence?" Cop asks. "Shhh!" Bo says. "DUN DUN HEARD THAT! YOU HORRIBLE SON, COP, DUN DUN DISOWNING YOU!" Dun Dun yells. "Really?" An excited Cop asks. "Don't get too excited, this is merely a phase." Bo says. "Our marriage was phase!" Dun Dun yells. "Oh come now sweetheart, you don't mean that." Bo says. "Dun Dun do mean that! SHE WANT A DIVORCE! AND SHE SUEING YOU FOR MENTAL STRESS!" Dun Dun yells. "But we have only been married for...wait just a moment, we aren't married at all! The dialogue previously stated that we are GOING to get married!" Bo says. "Crap, if we no married, Dun Dun cant sue. Let Dun Dun think...ah ha! Dun Dun will come out of closet, if you marry her now!" Dun Dun says. "But dear, how are we supposed to put together a wedding on such short notice?" Bo asks. "Dun Dun have the perfect solution." Dun Dun says.

*Three hours later, Yeller is tied to his chair while one of the kids continuously throws a basketball at him. "I said STOP TH-" Before Yeller can finish, the basketball is thrown and hits him in the face. The lady comes back. "Aw, how cute! My boys made a friend!" The lady says. "Untie me!" Yeller says. "Don't you worry your bald little head, Mister, my boys will untie you as soon as they done playing with you." The lady says. "I don't want to play with these brats anymore!" Yeller says. "Brats?! Why I would NEVER! How dare you talk that way about my boys! I'm so angry, I could eat a sandwich!" The lady says. She pulls out a 12 foot long sub. "Who brings a sub that big with them on a trip?" Yeller asks. "So now not only you insulting my boys, your gonna insult my eating habits too? Not today, sucker! You can stay tied up to that chair till I'm done with my sammy." The lady says. "That'll take about two seconds." Yeller mutters. "Boys, you can keep playing with your new friend till mommy finishes her lunch." The lady says. "Do we get any lunch?" One of the boys ask. The lady laughs. "Only if you packed yourself one, this is all for mommy." The lady says.

*Leafy Fan is with Bo and Cop. "What the devil are you doing here?" Bo asks. "Dun Dun called me, where is she?" Leafy Fan asks. "Dun Dun in closet!" Dun Dun yells. "Why on earth did she contact you?" Bo asks. "Oh, she said the two of you were engaged and she wanted Leafy and I to marry you two!" Leafy Fan says. "Are you even certified?" Bo asks. "Of course I am, the church of Leafy recognizes that I am able to marry people." Leafy Fan says. "Oh dear." Bo says. "Shall we begin?" Leafy Fan asks. "Dun Dun no coming out, so you have to do wedding with her in closet!" Dun Dun yells. "Okay, that's fine! So, um, do you, Bo Yeller, take Dun Dun, to be your lawfully wedded life?" Leafy Fan asks. "Uh, I think you mean wife." Bo says. "Now you correcting her too? Is there end to you madness?" Dun Dun asks. "You know what I mean! Do you or not?" Leafy Fan asks. "Yes, of course!" Bo says. "No, you have to say I do or it wont work." Leafy Fan says. "Very well, I do." Bo says. "And do you, Dun Dun, take Bo, to be your lawfully wedded husband?" Leafy Fan asks. "WHAT?! Dun Dun cant hear you from other side of this door!" Dun Dun yells. "Then come out, my dear!" Bo yells. "Dun Dun no going nowhere till we married!" Dun Dun yells. "DO YOU, DUN DUN, TAKE BO, TO BE YOUR FREAKING LAWFULLY WEDDED HUSBAND?!" Leafy Fan asks. "Not with that tone she not!" Dun Dun yells. "Alrighty then...will you PLEASE take Bo to be your husband?" Leafy Fan asks. "Dun Dun guesses so, She do." Dun Dun says. "Okay, uh, what are we going to do about the rings?" Cop asks. "Dun Dun have idea for that!" Dun Dun says. Bo notices a ring slip out from under the closet door. Bo puts it on his finger. "Uh, thank you very much, darling." Bo says. Bo kneels down and pushes a ring under the door. "Have you put the ring on yet?" Bo asks. "Stop rushing Dun Dun! She cant get it on her finger!" Dun Dun yells. "Hm, most people usually have trouble getting the ring off." Cop says. "Do you need some help?" Bo asks. "No, Dun Dun gud, she got it." Dun Dun says. "Now if anybody wants to object to this wedding, hehe, object, speak now, or forever hold their so called peace." Leafy Fan says. "I have a few objecti-" Before Cop can finish, Dun Dun yells "SHUT UP, FORMER SON OF DUN DUN!" Silence fills the room. "So, uh, I guess in the name of Leafy, I pronounce you husband and wife. You may now kiss the bride, or, the door she is hiding behind." Leafy Fan says. Bo goes to kiss the door, but Dun Dun swings it open and crushes Bo into the wall. "Dun Dun want a divorce!" Dun Dun yells. "Already? But we just got married!" Bo says. "Well Dun Dun couldn't get no divorce settlement if there no marriage. Duh!" Dun Dun says before walking off. Bo breaks down in tears. "Darling, wait!" Bo yells. "I guess that means they wont be needing a son anymore." Cop says before walking away. "I like playing pretend wedding, we should do it more often, Leafy!" Leafy Fan says before walking away, leaving Bo alone, sobbing on the floor.

*The kids are climbing on Yeller. The plane shakes and they both go flying out the window! "My babies!" The lady yells. "Good riddance." Yeller says. "How insensitive of you!" The lady yells. "Sorry about your kids, lady." Yeller says. "Who cares about those brats?! Their father left them $100,000,000.00 each for when they turn 18 and left me nothing! Now how am I gonna get my hands on the cash?" The lady asks. "If you jump now, you can still catch them." Yeller says. "Your right! I'M COMING MY BEAUTIFUL BANK ACCOUNTS!" The lady yells before jumping out the window. A flight attendant walks over to him. "Sir, did someone just jump out that window?" The attendant asks. "How heartless you must think I am if you think I would be sitting here so calm after somebody and her two kids took a nosedive out the window. Is this how you treat all of your passengers? Or just the good looking ones?" Yeller asks. "Sorry sir. I just came to warn you that we are experiencing some problems. You see, the pilot forgot to fill the fuel tank before he left. He's also passed out drunk." The flight attendant says. "So who's flying the plane?" Yeller asks. The flight attendant shrugs. "Well, I guess dying in a plane crash is better than going back home." Yeller says. "Good news, the plane is back on course and everyone is going to survive thanks to a group of magical unicorns that were kind enough to help us! Now you can all rest easy knowing that you'll be able to return home to your families!" The person on the intercom says. Yeller throws himself out the airplane window.

*Yeller's eyes pop open and he jumps out of bed. "Huh, what happened? I'm home!" Yeller says. Bo comes in. "Did you say something son?" Bo asks. "Dad, did you bail Dun Dun out of jail and then propose to her?" Yeller asks. "Heavens no! What do you think I am? Some simpleton?" Bo asks. "And did you adopt Cop?" Yeller asks. "No son, I did not. That must have been quite the dream you had." Bo says. "Yeah, I guess it was a dream." Yeller says.

Or was it?