S3 Episode 07: Cruise of Disaster! Part 1

YELLER HOUSEHOLD
*Yeller is sitting on the couch shifting through channels. "Son! Did you get the mail?" Bo asks from the other room. "No!" Yeller yells back. "CAN you get the mail?" Bo asks. "No!" Yeller yells back. Bo comes into the room. "Son, due to how little you actually do around here, you could at least get the mail when I ask you to." Bo says. "Cant do that Dad, I'm on strike." Yeller says. "On strike?!" An astonished Bo asks. "Yup. I don't appreciate how little you appreciate me. So until you begin to respect me, I wont be doing a thing for you." Yeller says. Bo opens a letter. "Son! You wont believe what we got in the mail! Tickets for a five star cruise!" Bo says. "Really?! When do we leave?!" An excited Yeller asks. "Well, according to you, I don't appreciate you, so I suppose I wont be asking you to come along." Bo says. "Did I say that? What I meant to say was that I don't appreciate YOU enough. Being a single father raising seven kids, it couldn't have been easy." Yeller says. "No, it was not, especially with you and Dan running around causing a ruckus." Bo says. "I'm sorry, will you ever forgive me?" Yeller asks. "Hm, I might consider it if you go and clean my car, retrieve my dry cleaning, perhaps even cook a dinner or two." Bo says. "Consider it done, Father." Yeller says. "Splendid! By the way, we received three tickets in the mail, so please choose our last guest wisely. And don't pick that Neanderthal Dun Dun!" Bo says. "Don't worry, I wont. Dun Dun wont be coming along for this cruise." Yeller says. He and Bo leave the room. A few moments later, drilling can be heard. All of a sudden, a hole is formed in the floor, and Dun Dun comes out of it! "Good thing Dun Dun still have old tunnel system." Dun Dun says. Dun Dun turns towards the camera. "Shhhh. Listen, Dun Dun supposed to be stealth Dun Dun, so she and you must be VERY quiet. No one can know she on property. Who, Dun Dun? No no, you no have to worry about Dun Dun ruining plan, Dun Dun quiet as an alligator." Dun Dun says. "Its mouse you moron! MOUSE!" A crew member from behind the scenes says. "What the difference?!" Dun Dun angrily asks. Dun Dun turns towards the camera once more. "Now it time for Dun Dun to move it move it. She have to go steal ticket for train ride." Dun Dun says. "Its-" Before the crew member can finish, Dun Dun interrupts him. "Don't you EVER correct Dun Dun again! Now get out, you fired." Dun Dun says. "You cant fire me." The crew member says. "Dun Dun can do anything she want, her mommy said so! Now GO!" Dun Dun yells. Footsteps can be heard as the crew member sulks off. "Now, what was Dun Dun doing again? Oh, yeah! Stealing ticket for train ride." Dun Dun says. Dun Dun attempts to tiptoe across the room, but then trips, and breaks a vase! "What was that?" Bo can be heard asking from the other room. "Darn, he on to Dun Dun! She must make off with ticket before fancy man with big hat return!" Dun Dun says. Dun Dun grabs the ticket, but then stubs her toe. "DOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!" Dun Dun screams in pain. "WHO THE DEVIL IS IN THERE?!" Bo angrily asks from the other room. "None of you business!" Dun Dun yells back. Mr. Whiskers trots into the room and notices Dun Dun. "Go away kitty, Dun Dun busy." Dun Dun says. Mr. Whiskers hisses at Dun Dun. "Dun Dun said go away! What, you no speak English? Fine, let Dun Dun speak in Misters of the whiskers language. Goeyay awayeyay. You understand Dun Dun now?" Dun Dun asks. Mr. Whiskers all of a sudden flies at Dun Dun, but Dun Dun does a somersault under him. Mr. Whiskers then pulls out a machine gun, and begins shooting everywhere in the room, missing Dun Dun every time. "Why do I hear gunshots?" Bo asks from the other room. "Probably just fireworks." Yeller can be heard saying. Dun Dun begins to run towards her hole. "You never get Dun Dun alive kitty, NEVER." Dun Dun yells. "Meow meow meow meow meow, meow, meow MEOW MEOW!" Mr. Whiskers yells. "Meow you too, loser!" Dun Dun yells back. Dun Dun jumps into the hole and lands in her secret woman. "Ha ha! Dun Dun win! Stupid kitty, thinking he could be the skillful Dun Dun. She too smart to be beaten by kitty." Dun Dun says. A wrapped present falls from the ceiling. "Ooooh, present for Dun Dun?" Dun Dun wonders. Dun Dun opens the gift, and its a stick of dynamite! "Dun Dun always wanted one of these! What is it? Oh, Dun Dun see it now! It must be rolling pin! Thank you misters of the-" Mister Whiskers is upstairs filing his nails as an explosion can be heard. "OH NO DUN DUN!" Dun Dun can be heard screaming. Bo comes into the room. "Mr. Whiskers, do you have any clue what all the noise is?" Bo asks. Mr. Whiskers looks around at all of the bullet holes in the walls and broken furniture, and shrugs.

CRUISE SHIP ENTRANCE
*Yeller and Bo are waiting in line. "So son, you never told me whom you enrolled to take care of Mr. Whiskers while we are away." Bo says. "Don't worry Dad, its somebody I REALLY trust." Yeller says.

YELLER HOUSEHOLD
*The doorbell rings, and Mr. Whiskers opens the door, finding Queen Goo standing there! "Hello dear, you must be the Cat I'm supposed to be baby sitting! I have a feeling we are going to have lots of fun together!" Queen Goo says. Queen Goo notices a bunch of machine guns laid out on the couch. "Uh...are those yours?" Queen Goo asks. Mr. Whiskers shakes his head no. "Right." Queen Goo nervously says.

CRUISE SHIP ENTRANCE
*Dun Dun cuts people in line. "Excuse me, out of Dun Dun way, she have dying aunt that she need to go see. Move it baldy!" Dun Dun yells. She continues to cut people, until she comes across Yeller and Bo. "Hey, you look lot like idiots Dun Dun live near." Dun Dun says. "We are your neighbors, you moron!" Yeller says. "What the devil are you doing here?" Bo asks. "Dun Dun have ticket." Dun Dun says. "Hmm, that's a coincidence. We had three tickets, and one of them was stolen." Yeller says. "Dun Dun never been so insulted in her entire life! How DARE you accuse Dun Dun of stealing! Dun Dun DISGUSTED." Dun Dun yells. "Oh, so I guess it must just be a coincidence that we have tickets for the same boat." Yeller says. "Boat? Dun Dun no have ticket for boat! She have ticket for train ride!" Dun Dun says. Bo takes Dun Dun's ticket. "Allow me to look at this. Hm, lets see....you buffoon! This CLEARY says boat ride! Didn't you take the time to read what the ticket said after stealing it?" Bo asks. "Dun Dun was in a rush." Dun Dun says. The line moves forward, and Yeller, Bo, and Dun Dun reach the front. "Hi, may I please see your tickets please?" The lady asks. Yeller and Bo go to present theirs, but Dun Dun pushes them aside, and shows the lady her ticket. "Let Dun Dun on to boat." Dun Dun says. "Uh, of course ma'am, just walk up the ramp. Have a nice day." The lady says. "Don't you pretend to care how Dun Dun's day goes! You don't like Dun Dun, she no like you, but you no hear Dun Dun telling you to have a nice day! You know why? Because Dun Dun hope you have TERRIBLE day! Dun Dun hope EVERYONE have terrible day! Now you tell losers working on boat to roll out red carpet, because Dun Dun have arrived!" Dun Dun yells. "Um...of course, ma'am." The lady says. "Good. And you tell them not to be nice to Dun Dun either! She no like that crap! Dun Dun no pretend to like you, so don't you pretend to like Dun Dun!" Dun Dun says before walking up the ramp. Bo walks over to the lady. "Um, just to be clear, my son and I are not affiliated with that woman in anyway. In fact, I don't believe we've ever seen her before in our lives!" Bo says. "Nope, never. No clue who that woman is." Yeller says. "Of course not, sirs. Please, proceed up the ramp." The lady says. Yeller and Bo walk up the ramp.

YELLER HOUSEHOLD
*"So, do you play patty cake?" Queen Goo asks. "Meow." Mr. Whiskers says. "I'll take that as a yes. Okay, ready? Patty cake patty-" Before Queen Goo can finish, Mr. Whiskers punches her in the face. "WHY YOU LITTLE-sweet kitty. We could play a different game if you'd like." Queen Goo says. "Meow meow." Mr. Whiskers says. Mr. Whiskers walks over to his guns and begins to clean them.

CRUISE SHIP DECK
*Yeller and Bo are now lounging on the deck. "Ah, what a beautiful day." Bo says. "Can we go home now?" Yeller asks. "No son, we won these tickets, and now, we are going to milk them for all they are worth. We do not leave until I am thoroughly satisfied with my tropical adventure." Bo says. "HEY! Get back here with my wallet!" Someone can be heard yelling as Dun Dun runs past Yeller and Bo. "Hm, wonder who that was?" Yeller wonders. "I haven't a clue." Bo says. Diamond and Pearl, dressed as waiters, walk over to Bo and Yeller. "We serve you with thunderus-ITS YOU!" Diamond and Pearl both yell upon seeing Bo and Yeller. "What on earth are the two of you doing here?" Yeller asks. "Allow us to explain." Diamond says.

Diamond: We relax under the blazing hot sun.
Pearl: We go night-night under the dark gloomy moon!
Diamond: The sparling assassin, Diamond!
Pearl: The infinitely intelligent, Pearl!
Diamond and Pearl: We now order you to hail all cruise ships!

*"What the heck are you talking about?" Yeller asks. "In simple terms, we work here now." Pearl says. "So...couldn't you have just come right out and said it, instead of going through that tired out song and dance?" Yeller asks. "Tired out?!" Pearl angrily asks. "Its not tired out! ITS A CLASSIC!" Diamond yells. "But enough about that, how may we be of service?" Pearl asks. "Leaving us alone would be a start." Yeller says. "Pearl, I'm beginning to get the distinct impression that we're not wanted here." Diamond says. "Fine, we'll leave. But we'll be back!" Pearl says before running off. Diamond soon follows. "Thank goodness they are gone. Now we can relax." Bo says. "Until the next interruption in 3...2..." Yeller says. Dun Dun walks up to them. "What now?" Yeller asks. "Dun Dun have problem." Dun Dun says. "What kind of problem?" Yeller asks. "You see, Leafy Fan annoy Dun Dun into letting her come along, yes? So, Dun Dun agree to let her come, but only if she stow away in Dun Dun's bag. Well, now Dun Dun missing that bag, which mean Leafy Fan also missing." Dun Dun says. "So let me get this straight, you misplaced your bag which contained your best friend, and now you have no idea where it went?" Yeller asks. "Dun Dun just bleeping said that!" Dun Dun yells. "Hm, I wonder where she could have ended up." Bo says.

CRUISE SHIP BEDROOM
*Diamond and Pearl walk in, and Pearl is holding a bag. Pearl drops the bag on the floor. "How dare they yell at us like that!" Pearl yells. "Chill out Pearl, we'll get them back." Diamond says. "Oooooh, do I detect an evil plan coming on?" Pearl asks. "You detect correctly. Now listen up, cause I'm not gonna repeat myself." Diamond says. Pearl comes close, and Diamond whispers something into Pearl's ear. "You really think we could pull that off?" Pearl asks. "I definitely think its possible." Diamond says. Diamond and Pearl then hear a mysterious noise. "Huh, what was that? A mouse?" Pearl asks. "Sounded too loud to be a mouse." Diamond says. "So are you saying our room....is HAUNTED?!" A scared Pearl asks. "Oh come on, if this room is haunted, then my name is Carla Hall." Diamond says. All of a sudden, Leafy Fan emerges from the bag on the floor. "AH, GHOST!" Diamond and Pearl both yell. "I'm glad to be out of that bag, it was kind of stuffy in there. Hey, look Leafy, its those guys in Halloween costumes!" Leafy Fan says. "You! How long have you been here?" Diamond asks. "Well, I've been in the bag since Dun Dun and I left the house. She was too cheap to pay for my ticket, so she stuffed me in this duffel bag." Leafy Fan says. "Darn, I bet she heard all about our evil plans!" Diamond says. "Evil plans?" Leafy Fan asks. "Well there isn't anything you can do about it! We're gonna do what we gotta do and if you try to stop us, we'll...beat you up!" Pearl says. "Yeah, we'll beat you up real bad!" Diamond says. "I didn't hear anything about any-" Leafy Fan is cut off. "We have to do something, we cant let her leave! She'll tell on us!" Diamond says. "If Mommy finds out, she is gonna be SO mad." Pearl says. "Not to mother, you idiot! To the captain, or security, or even worse, Yeller!" Diamond says. "But I didn't-" Leafy Fan is cut off again. "So what are we gonna do?" Pearl asks. "Lets get her." Diamond says. "Leafy, I'm scared." Leafy Fan says.

CRUISE SHIP DECK
*Leafy Fan can be heard screaming. "Hm, I wonder what that is." Bo says. "It definitely not Leafy Fan, Dun Dun know what her scream sound like, and that no her." Dun Dun says. "Who cares who it is? As long as it doesn't effect our vacation." Yeller says. The captain of the boat all of a sudden runs up to them. "Hello Captain Uglypants." Dun Dun says. "Um, aren't you supposed to be steering the boat?" Yeller asks. "Listen to me! You must evacuate the boat immediately! Two hooligans wearing Halloween costumes just hijacked the boat from me and are planning on sinking it!" The captain says. "How we evacuate? We in middle of ocean!" Dun Dun says. "There isn't any need anyways. There is no way that this boat is-" Before Yeller finishes, he notices the boat sinking lower and lower into the water. "Great, wonderful! The first boat I ever go on and it turns out to be the titanic!" Yeller says. "Try not to panic, I'm sure that there is some logical explanation." Bo says. "We going to die, old man! That logical for you? It no big deal for you, you so old, you probably die in few years anyway, but Dun Dun want to LIVE. There so many banks left unrobbed, so much more money to take!" Dun Dun yells. "Attention passengers, you may not have noticed, but the boat is sinking deeper and deeper into the water, that's because its sinking. You have Yeller to thank for that, he made Pearl cry." Diamond says over the speaker. Everyone looks at Yeller. "So, we hope you all have fun drowning!" Pearl says over the speaker. "Wait just a bloody moment! If the boat is sinking, doesn't that mean that the two of you will drown as well? You are, after all, still on the boat." Bo says. "Uh oh." Pearl says over the speaker. "Crap, I didn't think of that." Diamond says over the speaker. "Say, is there anyway we could UNSINK the boat?" Pearl asks over the speaker. "Of course not, you moron!" Diamond yells over the speaker. "Why are you yelling at me?! This was all your idea!" Pearl yells over the speaker. "Don't you throw stones at me! I didn't hear any objections from....crap. Is this thing still on?" Diamond asks over the speaker. "I think so." Pearl says over the speaker. "Oh, um, hello everybody. Just so you know, you now have the right to panic." Diamond says. Everybody starts to scream.

To be continued...